What Is the Word for Saying It Again
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What Students Are Saying About Rejection, Overcoming Fright and Their 'Word of the Twelvemonth'
Teenage comments in response to our recent writing prompts, and an invitation to bring together the ongoing conversation.
This calendar week on The Learning Network, our writing prompts asked teenagers to dig deep. One invited reflection on times they have benefited from rejection, another asked well-nigh how they accept overcome their fears, and a third challenged them to come up with one word to encapsulate their aspirations for the twelvemonth ahead.
Thanks to all those who joined the conversation this week from around the world, including teenagers from Savannah, Ga.; Loveland, Colo.; and Jiangsu Province, Prc.
Delight notation: Student comments accept been lightly edited for length, but otherwise appear every bit they were originally submitted.
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Take You E'er Benefited From Rejection?
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An aspiring actor named Axel Webber went viral on TikTok recently — not for achieving his goal of getting into the Juilliard School, but for beingness rejected from it. His story led to thousands of reassuring comments from strangers and celebrities alike.
Mr. Webber's post inspired the states to ask teenagers if they had experienced rejection — and if the consequences had been unlike from what they expected. Over 200 told u.s.a. about times when being turned down spurred them to work harder, reflect, grow and notice a new path. Here is a choice.
Rejection Tin Push Yous in a Positive Direction.
I believe that rejection is an opportunity for growth. When you are rejected it forces you to focus on what you need to work on to be better. So that if y'all go back, you tin can get the credence that is well deserved. Rejection motivates you lot to go on pushing and meliorate yourself. Personally, I have been on my school'south dance team for three years, however, yous have to try out to compete for our major competitions. For the kickoff two years, I did non make the competition squad. That rejection pushed me to piece of work on my skills and work on getting myself stronger and so that I tin exist set. After all my hardwork, I am finally able to compete. So yes, rejection is a good thing.
— Imperial, New Mexico
When I was younger, I submitted one of my Lego creations to a competition going on at the time. I unfortunately didn't win or get any recognition whatsoever, and while that did sting at first, it ultimately gave me the opportunity to reflection on my failure. Analyze what aspects the winning entries did better than mine and through that, abound creatively going forrad. At the end of the solar day if yous wish you become forrard you must prepare to occasionally be pushed backwards. And so you can accuse alee stronger than your would've been able to before.
— Nolan, Glenbard West
Rejection can be a fuel for success. There have been multiple times in life where I take failed, but I had to option myself back up to accomplish what was needed. For example, in that location was one fourth dimension where I didn't practise so practiced on a quiz for math. I saw the grade and knew I wanted a better one. I signed up for retakes, looked over my work, and studied. I ended up getting an100 on that retake and it brought my grade up farther than what it was before. Everyone needs a little bit of failure to succeed because at the cease of the day that neglect tin be used as fuel for success.
— Emeka, Kenwood Academy
We Can All Learn From Defeat.
Rejection hurts- whether it exist from a friend group or a college, the same thoughts are always triggered: "Am I proficient plenty?" Some may remember that these thoughts are purely harmful, but I would argue otherwise. These thoughts both encourage introspection by challenging a person's preconceived notions of themselves, and ultimately help remove the idea of worth from all that is tangible. Furthermore, rejection helps people consider what is truly meaningful to them, by testing the relationship between person and want. If something is truly desired, a single rejection should not be enough to end a dream, while information technology might give suspension as people consider whether their fight is worth the effort for other things. This effectively selects for the things that are most important in a person's life, and information technology is precisely this rejection that, through trial, empowers someone to live their best life.
— Brandt, Glenbard W High School
Of course, getting rejected hurts. As a senior, rejection is one of my biggest fears. At times, I am anxiously waiting for an email to meet if I got accustomed into the colleges I accept applied to. Still, rejection is not the finish of the world. Personally, I feel that rejection means information technology is non for me or it is not for me at that fourth dimension. Furthermore, I accept never let rejection make me feel like a failure. When I get rejected, I take it every bit a lesson on what I tin can do meliorate side by side time. A lot of people are terrified of rejection; however, I feel that rejection helps me grow every bit a person. For example, if I get rejected from a higher, I learn that that schoolhouse is non for me and I won't succeed there.
— Keiry, Don Bosco Cristo Rey High Schoolhouse
Rejection is something nosotros are all familiar with. Information technology's a "must" in our lives. It'due south something we run across during our journey to success. I was in the doldrums when I experienced rejection. I knew what failure tastes similar, just at the same time, the rejection pushed me and motivated me to get farther. I just had to endeavor again.
We should be open up with our disappointments or unfortunate times. We should not be embarrassed and we should not avoid it, but nosotros should embrace it. Once we face up rejection with optimism and conclusion to attempt again, we know that we have zero to lose. There would be a fervor created, there would be adrenaline pumping, and we go our brand new selves. More than resilient, more diligent, more than preserver.
— Bella, Suzhou SIP, Jiangsu Province, People's republic of china
Hearing "No" Is Scary.
I can't think of a time I benefited from rejection. In my stance, rejection is a actually scary thing. I generally avert trying out things unless I am good at them. When I effort something out and I'm struggling I experience humiliated. Facing the possibility of rejection is enough to make me not endeavour it at all. Looking at this commodity he faced rejection from the university of his dreams very publicly. Then his fans harassed the Instagram of the university. I experience like that'southward much worse than just getting rejected regularly.
— Shealynn, Hoggard High School in Wilmington, NC
It'south Important to Talk About Failure.
I practice call up that it is important to discuss failures because it'south not the terminate of the earth. I know a lot of people who accept their whole lives planned out and are so set-in-stone with the path they want to have and I'm just wondering when information technology'll autumn autonomously. The saying "no programme survives contact with the enemy" rings true in so many aspects of life and the main theme of that proverb is to be adaptable, to be prepared for the worst. The people who are so stubborn with their life plan are fragile because if something goes wrong, something they tin't predict, their entire world might seem like it's falling apart. It'due south important to set goals and strive for them, sure, simply life is full of complications and non being gear up for things to go wrong is setting yourself up for failure. Past discussing failure and showing how life continues, people can be more comfortable with information technology and gear up in example something happens they can't expect.
— Max, Hinsdale Central IL
I think that it is very important to openly discuss the times nosotros neglect to achieve our goals. Nobody is perfect. People make mistakes all the fourth dimension. Goals can be fabricated, but they are more frequently unsuccessful or failed. Even so, people merely ever talk virtually their achievements to expect better and feel ameliorate about themselves. If you only always hear about all the peachy things other people are doing, its going to negatively impact your mental health and self esteem if and when you fail to reach i of your goals. Sharing your bad experiences, like Mr. Webber did, normalizes the very normal concept of failure. People can relate to information technology and feel ameliorate about their experiences. Additionally, people can see that you tin recover from failures. Many think one is the end all and don't care to look for the bright side and proficient things that can come up instead. Mr. Webbers feel existence shared can aid people see that this is not the example. Failure and rejection one fourth dimension wont make for failure and rejection all the time.
— Nina, Baker Loftier Schoolhouse
By sharing our stories it allows for others to not experience so alone if they are going through a similar hardship too. It has been proven in many studies that by discussing and working through failure, it will aid and do good u.s. in the long run. Suppose all individuals who faced failure and struggle opened up to others, in that location would be an overflow of support and beloved. All this back up would help to create new goals and a new path was better than before. I think Mr.Webber chose to share his experience so that he can help others realize that failure and rejection doesn't always mean the end of an era, just the starting time of another affiliate.
— Delaney, Maury High School-Norfolk, VA
Rejection Is Non the Stop.
A common misconception in this mean solar day and age is the agreement that rejection is an irredeemable failure, suggesting that those who have been rejected have no hope of changing. Yet, this could non be further from the truth. While I agree they rejection should exist treated as a sign of failure, we demand to rethink the popular assumption that rejection indicates the disability to improve. For near people, rejection can be incredibly discouraging, as it may feel that 1's efforts amounted to nothing in the stop. Though this is understandable, this view is shortsighted. The strongest people are those who admit their faults and choose to amend upon them, or find other solutions such every bit Webber suggests in the article. This is something that gild should accept into consideration when faced with rejection in the future.
— Jose, Glenbard West
This is once when rejection tin actually help you by instruction you to exist patient and keep moving. You may not get what y'all want right away, just if yous're willing to piece of work hard and be patient, you lot will eventually observe yourself where you want to be. You may feel sadness in the starting time, but y'all will realize that this is an opportunity. Y'all may non realize it just still, merely you may become something even improve than you hoped for.
— C., Bronx
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How Practise You Overcome Your Fears?
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In a recent guest essay for the Opinion section, the poet Amanda Gorman revealed that she almost didn't deliver the at present-famous reading of her piece of work "The Hill We Climb" at President Biden'southward inauguration. Why? "I was terrified," she confesses.
In the essay, she tells readers how she overcame her fears and why doing then was worth information technology. We asked students to reflect on Ms. Gorman'due south communication and to share their own. They told us about the mantras they recite, the music they mind to, and the questions they enquire themselves to work through their doubts.
What Amanda Gorman Tin can Teach Usa About Fright
Unfortunately, fear is not something we can avoid, but something we must deal with. Ms.Gordon's recitation of her feel with fear during her big moment conveys that no one is immune to fear, not even extraordinary poets and public speakers. This article humanizes fear as something that we all become through and I constitute it extremely powerful as the article reveals that fright doesn't discriminate. Information technology is of import to remove the stigma and reformulate our feelings almost fearfulness and how fear doesn't make ane weak.
— Victoria, Westbury, NY
My fears have stopped me from doing many things I wanted to do. I have missed out on social events, schoolhouse, etc. I have very bad social anxiety and I have a really big fear of people judging me. This has made it really difficult for me to ask for assistance because i feel stupid when I do, and considering of this, I've had many missing assignments just because I was besides nervous to ask for aid. Afterwards reading this commodity, I've realized that many people experience the aforementioned way and that you should not permit your fears take you lot over because in the long run, you will look back and regret the opportunities you missed.
— Mckenzie, Loveland, Colorado
Fear keeps people from living. It traps usa and convinces united states of america that we are not up to the task, that we are likewise weak to struggle through. But Ms. Gorman's advice helps remind us that the only possible way to truly get over our fears is to own them and face them head on. Although information technology truly is a struggle to gather up the courage to own our fright, in the terminate, if nosotros follow through, the reward and accomplishing feeling is worth information technology. Ms. Gorman'south communication reflects this idea, so in the pursuit of getting over my public speaking fear, I will own it.
— Carlin, Glenbard West High School, Glen Ellyn
I struggle with ADHD and anxiety, both these diagnoses sometimes endeavour to scare me out of doing fifty-fifty the smallest of things. The anxiety-ridden voice in my head tries to talk me out of going somewhere or doing something with the "What if?" questions: "What if y'all fail?" What if y'all become injure?" "What if it doesn't get the style we planned?" Something I have learned then I don't laissez passer on stuff that would probably regret is to quiet those voices because if I didn't I would be like the speaker, Amanda Gorman, who almost passed on delivering her verse form at Biden's inauguration considering of the "What ifs." She figured out that if she missed out on that one time in a lifetime opportunity because of being scared of the possible outcomes, she might regret information technology forever.
— Olivia, Block four, Hoggard High School
Advice for Getting Through Scary Moments
Whenever my paranoid thoughts take over my mind, I say loudly to myself mentally, "Stop talking. Everything volition be okay," repeatedly. Information technology works well when there is something I tin can distract myself with (like a crowd), but when at that place are times when I'thou alone by myself, it does not piece of work as well. I try my best to think positively and look at the adept sides. "My parents volition be proud of me. I will exist proud of myself. This will be good for me."
— Yang, J.R Masterman Philadelphia, PA
Presenting in front of the class or preparing for a presentation brings me anxiety; consequently, I use several techniques that help me remain relaxed then that these nervous feelings do not hinder my presentation. Like Ms. Gorman, I recite words of confidence and encouragement. This is an effective strategy because information technology allows me to realize that I am prepared for what is alee. Additionally, I remind myself that the presentation volition last for a small period of time. After it is over, the force per unit area volition no longer be a brunt. Another effective tool I employ while talking to large groups of people is focusing on i spot in the oversupply. This prevents me from directly reading off notecards, and forces me to face the audience I am speaking to. These approaches have aided to ease my anxiety and allowed me to present more comfortably in front of my classes.
— Javier, Maury Loftier Schoolhouse, Norfolk VA
Learning to Deal With Fear or Anxiety
I was almost 12 years onetime. I call up driving up to the Disney parks and seeing the biggest roller coaster of my life, and saying that I would never ride on it. Well, I was incorrect. My mom had different plans for me. As we approached the ride, I was fine waiting for my family to do their thing, I even went as far as waiting by a churro stand equally they were in line. But so my mom called me to at least wait in line with them, then I was ready to go, and she asked me to at least go to the front of the line, then to at least wait on the side as they went on the ride, and then by some magical persuasion, I sat in the seat of my commencement roller coaster. I will acknowledge, it was fun, and that I have never stapled my anxiety as hard to anything, simply it was dainty to split up myself from my fears, and experience something that I would take never predicted would happen, not die.
— Belle, Atrisco Heritage Academy
If I am dealing with anxious thoughts and uncertainty at a certain time, I think to myself, "What am I doing?" and "Does this really thing?" If the reply is yes, then I try non to call back about it, as information technology would just atomic number 82 to more stress accumulation or I attempt and relax before I make a decision. Information technology is my personal belief that a decision made with emotions is a very rushed and illogical determination. After all that is done, I regroup and get-go to remember of a solution and if I don't think it'll piece of work, I'll ponder a while more. So I enquire myself, "What's the worst that could happen?" Then I go alee with the decision. If I am overcome with fear and severe anxious thoughts, then I go with a obviously different approach. As much every bit this seems far-fetched, I tend to have an easier fourth dimension with dealing with fear when I merely tell myself it'south just my head.
— David, Glenbard Due west Loftier School
I always had this abiding fear that something was lurking in the dark rather than fearing the darkness itself. To overcome this fright, I had to strength myself to arroyo it logically and care for information technology every bit whatsoever other scenario. For example, if I were venturing into the basement of my business firm, I would say to myself that goose egg was lurking in the dark and that it was unnecessary to think that way. Another example would exist my fear of failure, which I notwithstanding oasis't fully recovered from. This kept me from a critical opportunity when I scheduled to accept the Sabbatum, and I canceled the day before. I don't regret this, simply information technology was notwithstanding saddening that my stress hindered me from following through. Moving forrard, I plan to focus my efforts on reducing stress past facing these fears head-on with this mentality.
— Evan, Farmington High School
To overcome my feelings of dread or fear, I but turn on my favorite music from the sixty-80'southward. This tactic usually works, and I am able to get rid of any fears or dread past jamming out to these songs. Even though I don't country my fears out loud or recite mantras, similar Ms. Gorman, I am able to overcome them through joy and music. These approaches accept been very constructive for me and I have been able to lighten other people's twenty-four hour period considering of information technology.
— MiKayla, Colorado
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What's Your Word of the Year?
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A recent Well section newsletter shared the words readers had sent in that correspond the positive changes they would like to make in their lives in the side by side yr.
Information technology inspired the Film Prompt, "Your Give-and-take of the Yr," in which we asked students, besides, to cull a give-and-take to represent their hopes for 2022, and to explicate why they chose it. Here are some of the answers.
"Incandescent"
The past two years were filled with darkness and hopelessness, waiting for the pandemic to end, mourning the loss of those who have passed due to the virus, or any other tragedy that has The sense of loneliness and isolation hung in the air whenever nosotros walked outside after being trapped indoors for so long with minimal contact and communication. This year, I hope for a bright, incandescent yr filled with success and happiness. I hope for liveliness and free energy, having the strength to reach new limits that accept never been reached in the past. I hope to observe new fascinations, and rediscover one-time passions afterwards two years of being bored and bromidic.
— Maria, Hoggard High Schoolhouse in Wilmington, NC
"Embrace"
Through this twelvemonth I hope to cover both the good and bad in my life. I hope to embrace both success and failure with open arms and cherish each feel. I want to embrace myself and those around me with nothing but love and acceptance. The last few years accept been plagued with incertitude and sorrow—making it challenging to focus on embracing all aspects of our lives. To heal this cycle, I'thou dedicated to embracing everything 2022 has to offering, and truly appreciating life.
— Lucy, Glenbard West High Schoolhouse
"Admiration"
This is the first word that came to mind when I chose my word at the first of 2022. Adoration, every bit defined by dictionary.com, is "deep beloved and respect." I want to adore my life, not only tolerate information technology. I want to live each mean solar day with intention, not merely surviving, but passionately living. I want this yr, and every twelvemonth moving frontwards, to be filled with feelings of admiration. I desire to deeply love the people I surround myself with, non simply tolerate them. I want to adore my sport, my schoolhouse life, my routines, and my daily adventures. The pursuit to adore my life, to autumn in love with every practiced thing information technology entails- adventure, joy, laughter, faith, fullness and goodness- will help me to accept gratitude when life gets tough. There is always room to adore life and with that admiration comes great gratitude for life, fifty-fifty in long days and hard circumstances.
— Winn, Hoggard Loftier Schoolhouse in Wilmington NC
"Satisfied"
In that location is no betoken in nitpicking our lives and finding a flaw in every niggling thing. To exist satisfied is to exist happy and content. Nobody likes to exist around a complainer and nobody likes to be around the person who would conspicuously rather be somewhere else. Existence satisfied with where you are and who you are with is the most of import affair in my eyes. Brand the people around y'all feel comfortable and bask your fourth dimension with them, wherever y'all are.
— Clare, Glenbard West High School
"Improvement"
This twelvemonth, I want to try and focus on myself the best I can and improve who I am mentally and physically. I want to focus on improving my health habits, finding the rights friends, and taking more breaks from toxic people and social media. I want to improve and become a better me for 2022 and just keep getting meliorate. I am going to work hard in school, dance, and my mental health to ameliorate who I am equally a person. I desire to find myself once more and make my life improve eventually.
— Kate, Syracuse, NY
"Grow"
This is the twelvemonth where I will improve my skills and grow them. I have a bad habit of procrastinating, and I programme on growing out of it this twelvemonth. I am too in a running sport and would like to run faster and grow out of my old self. This is the yr we all have to step up and become onto the task. The pandemic has taken abroad a lot of our productivity these past two years, and we accept to become back on runway. We certainly won't be going back to normal, but that is why nosotros have to grow into something new and amend.
— Rithvik, Mission San Jose
"Persevere"
I think during these times specially, we all need this the most. We all need to call up to go along going even when things get tough. As a junior in high school, my life right now is pretty stressful. I'm preparing to apply to colleges, getting set up to take the SAT, balancing a chore and school, all while being in a pandemic. Although things are really hard for anybody right now, I always tell myself to persevere. Even though sometimes I only want to give up, I remind myself of my goals, and what I want to accomplish. I know that giving up will prevent me from accomplishing my goals. Overall, this twelvemonth will be extremely stressful and scary, just I think we all demand to do i matter—persevere.
— Marissa, Glenbard W HS
"Pragmatic"
This discussion, other than beingness the word for this year, is my favorite give-and-take. According to the Google definition, pragmatic ways "dealing with things sensibly and realistically in a style that is based on applied rather than theoretical considerations". I want to dive into 2022 realistically and sensibly, especially every bit my junior year in high school comes to an end and I start to plan my life out moving frontward. I don't desire to overwork or dissappoint myself this coming December, but I also don't want to regret anything I didn't practise.
— Elizabeth, Glenbard West High School Glen Ellyn, IL
"Calmness"
I believe if you lot stay calm and relaxed you can achieve and so much more. You could besides take less stress, less anxiety, depression and then much more than. Past staying calm you can just recollect about the expert and never the bad, you tin be around more people and non be anxious. Staying calm can too ameliorate relationships with others. When beingness at-home with people y'all won't be so quick to think about something the wrong style, and tin can take that information and process it to where you lot understand information technology improve. You can also manage your free energy, and not always burn yourself out, and yous won't be nervous about a lot of stuff. Calmness tin improve your creativity and how you may have seen things earlier, you may see them totally differently than how you see things now.
— MW, Hoggard High Schoolhouse in Wilmington, NC
"Myself"
I have found that focusing on one's own self - as in their interests, hobbies, and personality brings so much peace and ease to their life. Since quarantine, other people's choices and opinions have been affecting me in different ways, to where I started questioning everything I do and say. After months of isolation, returning to the 'existent globe' had come up with difficulties, only with this new yr, I pursue a future of confidence and perseverance. I will proceed doing the things I have recently found and loved, as well as embrace and discover new interests I've been too scared to endeavor. 2022 was a skillful year for me, and a huge leap from 2020. Anybody started gradually returning to their lives, jobs, school, and more than. I started enjoying life as it is and gained and so much confidence in myself this yr, and I am then grateful for all the blessings it has brought me. 2022, on the other hand, will hopefully be a meliorate year of discovery and hard work. Equally The editor of the Well newsletter states, 2022 should exist a year of "focusing on the things that are most meaningful to you." From meeting new people, visiting family, and doing what I love, I will further shift my focus to me, myself, and I.
— Lara, Cary High Schoolhouse
"Compassion"
Not but compassion towards others, but compassion to myself. During the last few years- especially with Covid and quarantines- I accept struggled to find self-honey while isolated from the people who love me most. And although school is in session, isolation is over, and I tin see friends each day, that feeling of self-honey isn't always around. This is why my 2022 word is "pity." I want to learn how to exist compassionate to myself and help anyone else who may experience similarly…That is what my year will exist about. I will strive to be agreement, fair, and empathetic to myself, too as to those I care about about.
— Bearding, Glenbard West High School
"Monophobia"
My word means the fearfulness of being alone. I choose this give-and-take because during 2021, life was very alone and none of my friends were around. I want to fix that and make 2022 less lonely than 2021.
— Makayla, Mission San Jose Loftier
"Sound"
Every single one of the states went through a lot these past two years during lockdown similar having mental health problems, physical health problems or financial issues, but nosotros couldn't do annihilation about information technology because of lockdown and all of us were silenced. Nosotros were silenced because fifty-fifty if nosotros wanted to discover a solution, there wasn't any. Our mental health everyday was getting worse because we couldn't go outside and we had minimal to no communication with others, we were silenced. Our physical health was being compromised because we couldn't go exterior to exercise and run into the dominicus and we couldn't experience amend, nosotros were silenced. Our financial bug were increasing because many people had lost their jobs and the economy was subsiding, and nevertheless we were silenced.
These past two years have been null just silence, simply with 2022 we should break that with sound. Sound can be the solution to our problems that we've faced through these past two years. We can break that silence with audio when we go outside, communicate with others, and we have opportunities to get jobs. We, together, tin can intermission the silence that we've faced with sound.
— Hana, Mission San Jose High Schoolhouse
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Source: https://www.nytimes.com/2022/01/27/learning/what-students-are-saying-about-rejection-overcoming-fear-and-their-word-of-the-year.html
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